How to Have Accountability Discussions that Inspire: 8 Tips for Your Next Conversation 

One of the most shunned leadership responsibilities is directly addressing co-workers’ poor performance. Lack of accountability is a key contributor to disappointing results, low team morale, distrust, and other hinderances to successful outcomes. 

In a previous article we explored tips for enhancing individual/team accountability. We now turn our attention to having difficult conversations to address when teammates have exhibited a significant gap between expectations and reality. They fell short of delivering what was assigned to them. 

The reasons we avoid accountability conversations are many. They are uncomfortable and quite often messy. But they don’t have to be. Conducting them is a skill that can be learned and honed through practice. 

Below are eight tips to help you be a thoughtful leader even in times of correction and critique.  

First, let’s focus on important mindsets to help you prepare for the conversation. Spend time with these before being face to face with your colleague. 

• Approach with curiosity. Try to put aside assumptions and begin with “I wonder” statements (“I wonder why this project could have been over budget”). 

• Ability vs. attitude. Remind yourself that most people do all they can to fulfill expectations and make valuable contributions. When things go wrong, people usually have dropped the ball due to a lack of knowledge, skill, or experience rather than an unwillingness to do a task. 

• Fear will be present. Because a team member knows they missed the mark, they already are reminded of their inadequacies and limitations. They perceive you may view them as incapable. How can you sidestep that fear to interact from a place of trust and understanding? 

• Think about Pygmalion. OK, it’s an odd name, but an important principle that states that “we get what we expect”. In other words, your team’s performance is greatly influenced by your positive or negative expectations. Has that come into play? 

Next, use these recommendations to help guide your successful discussion. Of course, the presumption is that you already have fostered an environment of psychological safety, have necessary data and documentation, and allotted ample time in a dedicated space. 

1. Give a heads-up.

No surprise attacks; ambushes never end well. In the invitation, state the reason for the discussion and how they can prepare. 

2. Name the issue clearly and directly.

Highlight the specific actions (or lack thereof) and the resulting negative impacts. Rely on your documentation. Tie to the larger purpose and describe “why this matters”. 

3. Suggest your possible contribution to the problem.

First, wondering about your involvement does not set you up for blame. In humility, own anything that may have made you part of the existing issue. This reinforces your partnership, even though they “own” the issue at hand. 

4. Invite engagement to collaborate.

Seek confirmation on your summary of the problem. This is a transition step to move into the other person’s perspective. Avoid their tendency to start with excuses at this point. Then express your desire to work together on a productive path forward. 

5. Ask for their evaluative view.

Start with facts and then get to opinions and reasons. Avoid “why” questions (these anticipate an excuse you don’t want to hear). Instead, “What did you do?” invites responsibility. 

6. Elicit their ideas.

Ask for how they want to proceed. Generate multiple options while maintaining their ownership. Caution: avoid the urge to “fix it”. Additional productive steps at this stage are to ask them to a) write down their formal plan, and then b) make it public by sharing it with other stakeholders. 

7. Commit support.

Express trust in them. Reinforce that you are on their team and want them to succeed. Ask “How might I help? What can I do to support you?”. Say “I (we) am counting on you. I trust you can make this happen.” 

8. Clarify next steps.

This is the time for re-establishing clear expectations. Set a date/time for the next meeting, as well as specifically what you’ll cover. 

Is this the perfect menu? Perhaps, but it is intended to help you prepare for and conduct a richer and more rewarding and inspiring discussion. Accountability will be elevated, and relationships will be enhanced. 

Gary McClure is a senior consultant at Thrivence, a consulting firm specializing in strategy, leader development, organizational performance, and technology. For more than 15 years, Gary has led organizational transformation initiatives and taught leaders how to navigate successful change. He can be reached at gary.mcclure@thrivence.com or visit here. We offer a full suite of planning services, from in-depth discovery and strategy activities to implementation and communications expertise.